So, the Screen awards for 2012 got handed out in an elaborate awards function show last night. We’ll get to see more of it in a few weeks, when the heavily edited, and appropriately placed emoticons of Priyanka Chopra smiling at Shahid Kapoor’s jokes will be one of the highlights of the show. Because, if we talk about the awards, the final winners list looks more like a token give-away to anyone who attended the show. And just in case the blogosphere doesn’t explode with opposing comments over SRK winning an award in a year where he’s mostly done more publicity work than Times Square billboards, Screen has quite conveniently created new categories to make everyone a very happy family. Welcome to the Bollywood awards season – the season of egalitarian policy and where acting doesn’t matter.

Earlier in the month, we made some predictions. And by the looks of it, Screen actually managed to pull off a “ha-ha, gotcha! In your face everyone”. Hit the jump, as we review the winners, and also review our predictions vs. the final list of winners.

THE 18th SCREEN AWARDS 2012 – WINNERS

TECHNICAL AWARDS:

Costume: The Dirty Picture  / OKS: Ra.One
Verdict: Fair-dos

Action: Ra.One / OKS: Ra.One
Verdict: Told-ya

Choreography: Bosco Caeser – Senorita, ZNMD / OKS: Chammak Challo – Ra.One
Verdict: Meh! Senorita looked more like impromptu stuff. I don’t see anyone doing Abhay’s moves. Chammak Challo is still my winner.

Cinematography: R Madhi – Shaitan / OKS: ZNMD
Verdict: Fair-dos

Dialogue: ZNMD / The Dirty Picture / OKS: Tanu Weds Manu
Verdict: WTF!!! TDP for it’s mega boom-bastic Emraan Hashmi metaphors, dropped at 1000 per minute. And what is with the two winners. Ooh, there’s more!

Story: Delhi Belly / OKS: Stanley Ka Dabba
Verdict: WTF!!! I don’t get it how a crime caper comedy is the best story we’ve heard in 2011.

MUSIC AWARDS:

Lyrics: Prashoon Joshi – Aarakshan / OKS: Irshaad Kamil – Rockstar
Verdict: Complete WTF!!! I think the closest comparison would be to give SRK the best actor for English Babu Desi Mem. Wait, did he win anything for that?

Music: A.R.Rahman – Rockstar / OKS: A.R.Rahman – Rockstar
Verdict: Told ya! This was unstoppable.

Background Score: Ranjit Barot – Shaitan / OKS: Ram Sampath – Delhi Belly
Verdict: Fair-dos.

Playback (Male): Mohit Chauhan – Rockstar / OKS: Mohit Chauhan – Rockstar
Verdict: Told ya! Another one of the most predictable winners this year. Although, I’d have LOVED to see Bappi da going home with this award this year!

Playback (Female): Shreya Ghoshal – The Dirty Picture / OKS: Usha Uthup – 7 Khoon Maaf
Verdict: Fair-dos. Yes, Shreya is deserving, but more so for Saibo, imho. But am happy with this too.

MAIN AWARDS:

Child Artist: Partho Gupte – Stanley Ka Dabba / OKS: Partho Gupte – Stanley Ka Dabba
Verdict: Yep, told ya!

Ensemble: ZNMD / OKS: Chillar Party
Verdict:  Fair-dos. I think I got a bit carried away with my own judgement, rather than who I believed would win on the night. Stupid decision, considering how obvious it was that Screen loved ZNMD.

Actor in a comic role: Pitobash – Shor in the City / OKS: Pitobash – Shor in the City
Verdict: Told ya! A very well deserved award. All the best for Filmfare and future projects.

Promising Newcomer (Male): Divyendu – Pyar Ka Punchnama / OKS: Pitobash – Shor in the City
Verdict: Haven’t seen the movie PKP, so really can’t give the verdict on this.

Promising Newcomer (Female): Parineeti Chopra  - Ladies Vs. Ricky Bahl / OKS:  Parineeti Chopra  - Ladies Vs. Ricky Bahl
Verdict: Told ya!

Actor in a negative role (Male): Prashant Narayanan (Murder 2) / OKS: Amole Gupte – Stanley Ka Dabba
Verdict: Fair-dos. Prashant was good, but it is hard for me to judge, since the Korean original, The Chaser, is far superior than the desi-copied version.

Actor in  a negative role (Female): Priyanka Chopra – 7 Khoon Maaf / OKS: Kalki Koechlin – Shaitan
Verdict: Fair-dos. But, am curious if she had a performance lined up for the night.

Supporting Actor: Saif Ali Khan -Aarakshan / OKS: Rajesh Sharma – No One Killed Jessica
Verdict: WTF! And I’d like to add a thousand more WTFs. Seems like the name of the movie for which Saif got the award speaks for itself.

Supporting Actress: Aditi Rao Hydari – Ye Saali Zindagi / OKS:  Parineeti Chopra – Ladies Vs Ricky Bahl
Verdict: Fair-dos.

Actor: Ranbir Kapoor – Rockstar / OKS: Ranbir Kapoor – Rockstar
Verdict: Told ya!! Was anyone else even competing?

Actress: Vidya Balan – The Dirty Picture / OKS:  Vidya Balan – The Dirty Picture
Verdict: Ditto!

Director: Milan Luthria – The Dirty Picture / OKS:  Milan Luthria – The Dirty Picture
Verdict: Told ya! Although, I believe Filmfare will decided otherwise.

Film: The Dirty Picture / ZNMD / OKS: Shor in the City
Verdict: WTF!! Fair-dos. I managed to get both of them wrong. LOL. And what part of Best Film says two movies? Aah, it’s all about loving your family and front row seats.

 MORE WTF-ery 

Popular Choice Male: Shahrukh Khan for Don 2. / OKS: Can I LOL now, or should I just shoot you in the face?

Popular Choice Female: Deepika Padukone for Desi Boyz. / OKS: What movie is that ?

Performer Of The Year: Ekta Kapoor / OKS: Thank you Ekta jee for making The Dirty Picture and Ragini MMS and Shor in the City.

Jodi Award: SRK and Priyanka Chopra / OKS: Did I hear her blush and smile uncontrollably again like on that Koffee show?

Ramnath Goenka Memorial Award for “having made a difference”  - Aarakshan
OKS: And Stanley Ka Dabba which addressed the issue of Child  Labour is irrelevant compared to the “making difference” qualities of Saif winning the Supporting Actor. Two words – Bitch please!

Didn’t predict in my previous post:

Sound Design: Kunal Sharma – Shaitan
Editing: Huzefa Lokhandwala – Delhi Belly
Production Design: Delhi Belly
SFX: Ra.One
Screenplay: Delhi Belly

SCORES:

Told ya: [Correct Predictions ] – 9 out of 35
WTF: [Screen needs some education ] –  8.5 out of 35
Fair-dos: [That was ok! ] – 9.5 out of 35

And Asha Bhonsle received the Lifetime Achievement Award. Congratulations Asha jee and keep blessing us with your melodious voice. On that note, I end this post. Please leave your comments below.

_______________________________________________

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The nominations for the 57th Filmfare Awards have been announced. And by the looks of it, the jury clearly did not watch a lot of movies. There is a clear omission of some of the most best movies in Bollywood of 2011. And a clear favouritism can be spotted as well, as you’d expect from the biggest movie awards in Bolly land. There is no clear consistency in the number of nominees (as in some have 5 nominees, and others 6 – e.g. Best Actor / Actress), and certain nominations are complete wtf-ery. The complete list can be found at the Filmfare awards website.

Hit the jump, as I discuss the nominations, and make my predictions.

Lyrics: Quite similar to the Screen award nominations, but wtf – Javed saab got a nomination, not for Khwabo Ke Parindey, but for the more impromptu Senorita. Remember  - “Na Main Samjha, Na Main Jaana, Jo bhi tumne hai mujhse kaha hai Senorita“. Really Filmfare..Really? Gulzar saab’s Daarling also makes it to the list, along with Irshaad Kamil’s Rockstar accomplishments. And to end the list is another mindfuck – Vishal Dadlani for Chammak Challo. I think it is indeed the end of the world order.

OKS Prediction: Irshaad Kamil for Sadda Haq, but if Vishal wins for Chammak Challo – all bets are off.

Music: A surprise entry here – Sohail Sen is nominated for Mere Brother Ki Dulhan. IMHO, that soundtrack had only one good track and that was Madhubala. Is it worth the nomination – No! Tanu Weds Manu is absent from the list, and so is Shor in the City. Other nominees are Vishal Shekhar for Ra.One, A.R. Rahman for Rockstar, and SEL for ZNMD.

OKS Prediction: A.R. Rahman for Rockstar, just coz it’s easy and uncontroversial.

Playback Singer Male:  Filmfare seems to be clearly impressed by Mohit Chauhan, as he gets dual nods for Rockstar. But wtf, Akon and Vishal for Best singer in Chammak Challo. C’mon, that song was so auto-tuned that even the fire brigade siren called it it’s step brother. And seriously Shafqat and Rahat nominated for one of their weakest songs ever. There is no explanation whatsoever for Bodyguard making it to the nominations, for any of the categories.  There’s no Tochi Raina, Shriram Iyyer for D-D-Dilli, or Wadali Brothers for Rangrez, or Lehmber Hussainpuri for Saddi Gally. And where is Bappi da’s Ooh La La? Bloody annoying!

OKS Prediction: Mohit Chauhan for Rockstar; he’s the man of the moment.

Playback Singer Female:  Again, you can see Filmfare did not listen to that many soundtracks. Bodyguard is included again, just so that we do not forget the year’s biggest grosser. Alyssa Mendosa’s Khwabo Ke Parindey gets the well deserved nod, and so does Shreya’s Saibo. Usha Uthup’s Daarling is a safe bet, but really – Katiya Karu ? I didn’t even like it a bit. Where is Sona for Bedardi Raja? I give up.

OKS Prediction: Alyssa Mendosa for Khwabo Ke Parindey, ZNMD

Supporting Actor Female: It’s interesting to see Juhi Chawla (I Am) getting on the nominations list after ages, and for a well deserved role. Up against her are, Parineeti Chopra (Ladies vs Ricky Bahl), Rani Mukherjee (No One Killed Jessica), Swara Bhaskar (Tanu Weds Manu), and Kalki Koechlin (ZNMD). If it was left for me to choose, I’d go for Swara Bhaskar for her intense and fierce Biharan performance, an absolute treat to watch. But again, this is the Filmfare awards.

OKS Prediction: Juhi Chawla, I Am.

Supporting Actor Male: Evidently, Filmfare lapped up ZNMD..or vice versa. Farhan and Abhay make it to the Best Supporting role nominations. And poor Arjun, I mean Hrithik msut’ve felt left out. Quite cool to see Naseer saab getting a nod as well for his Superstar Surya role in The Dirty Picture. And Vir Das nominated for Delhi Belly is just one of those favouritisms I was talking about. Probably, it is more down to him doing the hosting honours last year, or his Jaa Chudail routine, whichever you preferred. Ending the list, is the strongest contender – Pitobash for Shor in the City. And you know how much I loved his role as Mandook.

OKS Prediction: Pitobash, Shor in the City. I hope Filmfare does an ‘Udaan’, and gives it to the well deserved guy.

Continue here for the Big 4 >> Best Actor / Actress / Director / Film

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As the new year settles in, we are bombarded with the year’s first of many Bollywood awards - The 18th Annual Colors Screen Awards. The nominations are out, and in this post, I’ll be ranting a lot and trying to review the choices for the nominations of this year. Also, winner predictions will be made, and trust me, you can place your bets based on my predictions** (Only at your own risk)**.

The complete list of nominations can be found on Screen’s website here.

P.S., we won’t be discussing all the categories.. pfft. Way too many to even count. Hit the jump for the review.

TECHNICAL AWARDS

Costume: Seems like the only chance for Patiala House to have surfaced on the awards nominees list. But really, what was so striking about the costumes of that movie? But well, neither can I remember anything about two other nominees – Mausam, Ye Saali Zindagi. Ra.One seems like a good contender for bringing spandex back to fashion, but especially for THAT striking Bebo red sari in Chammak Challo. Either that, or the Pink Apsara costume of Vidya (The Dirty Picture), that I’ve been drooling on.

OKS prediction – Ra.One

Choreography: All predictable nominees here, with Chammak Challo, Senorita, Ooh La La, Disco Fighter, and Darling making the cut. In terms of mass appeal, Chammak Challo wins it by a mile. By that I mean, everyone remembers the signature rotatory motion that everyone was doing in Chammak Challo. The next contender I believe is Ooh La La, but that is more about a “back to the 70′s” set, rather than choreography. But then, Screen could go mental and just go fuck it, we’ll award the Disco Fighter song.

OKS Prediction – Chammak Challo – Ra.One

Action: Of all the ones nominated, I liked the non-cheap look of Don2 the most. Although Ra.One had it’s edge over others, with wire-fu and rasengans flying. I am not a big fan of the Vijayan Master school of dishoom dishoom that we got to see in Bodyguard. I think Dabangg was the end of it. And Singham was all about Ajay Devgan doing a Lady Gaga routine.

OKS Prediction – Ra.One

Cinematography: Both Delhi Belly and Rockstar had some exceptional cinematography work, but the obvious choice this year is Carlos Catalon for his portrayal of Spain as a character on it’s own in ZNMD.

OKS Prediction - ZNMD

Dialogue: No, I do not agree with Delhi Belly qualifying as a nominee for it’s expletives. And Farhaan and Abhay Deol’s antics with Bwoys, Mr. The Dubeys, and Mantal – that is not award worthy material. And no, I almost had a migraine after I finished comprehending the many metaphors of The Dirty Picture. And why the hell is Chillar Party not nominated here? My winner is Tanu Weds Manu, for it’s absolute spot on North Indian middle class twang in Hindi – from the very Bihari Payal, to the oh-so natkhat Puppy jee (Deepak Dobriyal).

OKS Prediction - Tanu Weds Manu

Story: I don’t get how some movies like 404 and Mujhse Fraandship Karoge are doing in this category. And I really don’t know why Shor in the City or Shaitan are not in this category. Seems like a bit of a egalitarian policy to not nominate these, as it seems like Screen will be awarding one of these movies in either of the categories. Pfft. Nevertheless, it is great to see Stanley on the list.

OKS Prediction - Stanley Ka Dabba

MUSIC AWARDS

Lyrics: Irshaad Kamil has been nominated for Rockstar and Javed Akhtar for ZNMD. But why the fuck isn’t lyrics writer Rajshekhar nominated here for the mammoth Rangrez?

OKS Prediction - Irshaad Kamil for Sadda Haq

Music: I agree with most of it, as you can see from my own OKS Bollywood Music Awards posts (part 1, and part 2). I’d love to see Krsna or Ram Sampath win. But we all know who’ll take home this one.

OKS Prediction - A.R.Rahman for Rockstar.

Playback (Male) : Mohit Chauhan has been a tour de force this year with Rockstar. But that doesn’t guarantee a win, especially at Screen which has always been very unpredictable in this category. I will LOVE to see Bappi da win this. But on a serious note, ..

OKS Prediction - Mohit Chauhan – Rockstar

Playback (Female) : All nominees are wrong, just fucking wrong. Except for Usha Uthup for Darling. Shreya could’ve been nominated for Saibo, but they went for Ooh La La ( The Ooee Maa must have done it’s magic). And I cannot disagree more on nominating Khoya Khoya Chand. NO!

OKS Prediction - Usha Uthup – Darling

Background Score: If Ram Sampat doesn’t win the Best Music award, I think he should get it. Else, there’s always SEL for ZNMD, or Amit Trivedi for No One Killed Jessica.

OKS Prediction - Ram Sampath – Delhi Belly

Continue to Page 2>> where we discuss the MAIN AWARDS.

]]> http://www.oneknightstands.net/the-screen-awards-2012-nominations-review-and-predictions/feed/ 2 http://www.oneknightstands.net/oks-bollywood-music-awards-2011-part-2/ http://www.oneknightstands.net/oks-bollywood-music-awards-2011-part-2/#comments Thu, 29 Dec 2011 22:56:43 +0000 Sujoy http://www.oneknightstands.net/?p=2618

As Magnus Magnusson said – I have started, so I’ll finish. We began our series of awarding the year’s best of Bollywood with Part 1 of OKS Bollywood Music Awards. And so here we are with the concluding part of the Bollywood Music Awards. If you haven’t read Part 1, here is the link. As for now, let’s switch to the same gear where we left it.

Paish hai Deviyo Aur Sajjano..

The OKS Bollywood Music Awards 2011

* Part 2*

Feel good song of the year :

Dabba – Stanley Ka Dabba

Amole Gupte’s beautiful ode to the beauty of the tiffin is a three course meal in itself. Hitesh Sonik’s minimal arrangements with an acoustic guitar riff and domestic utensils sounds, accompanied by the chirpy and carefree Sukhwinder Singh, brings out the best way innocence can be put into a song. Who knew Recess could be romanticised? It leaves you hungry, and craving for that recess bell!

Bhangra Track of the year:

Saddi Gully – Tanu Weds Manu

There are no second thoughts about it. This year’s best Bhangra track goes to Lehmber Hussainpuri’s Saddi Gully from the Tanu Weds Manu soundtrack. There is no other track which can even stand close to the infectious bass groove and the clever dholak pieces. And that DJ disc scratch gives it the club edge..sort of. Love it to bits, and I don’t think it will ever be going out of my playlist.

Sufi song of the year:

Fayaa Kun – Rockstar

Javed Ali and A.R.Rahman do it again. If Arziyaan from Delhi 6 was brilliant, this has to be termed “better than brilliant”. Sufi never sounded so clean, minimal and soul wrenching. Even our hero, in the voice of Mohit Chauhan, gets to chip in his input with Sajra Savera Mere Tan Barse Kajra Andhera Teri Jalti Lau.. But my favourite bit of this track is the bit with Javed Ali singing “Sadaq Allahul-ali yul-Azeem’. Divine.

Welcome Back Vocals of the year :

Bappi Lahiri – Ooh laa laa

The original Baap of Bling Bling got back into his recording chair and showed us what it is to bring back the Phanta-See of the 70′s. A wicked arrangement which mimics the retro strings and dholki style of the 70s, Vishal Shekhar’s music literally rides on Bappi da’s naughty and flirtatious vocals. Welcome back Bappi da! Or should I say, Hoodibaba wachow! Bring on more of the Phees Phraai.

Song better than the movie award:

Madhubala – Mere Brother Ki Dulhan

Ali Zafar’s ham-ster from Ham-istan role in Mere Brother Ki Dulhan has only one good thing to offer. This song. It works on every single level. It brings out the much needed desi flavour that we have been missing in this year’s soundtracks, which have been heavy on techno and autotune sounds.  The female singer on this track – Shweta Pandit, sounds really close to being a Poornima clone (remember her?). The only thing I can complain about the song is that it gets over way too soon. Only if the movie was half as good as the song! Wishful thinking.

Continue Here to Page 2 -> We award The Voice Of The Year, Soundtrack Of The Year and more.

It’s almost the end of the year, and you know what that means. Whilst snobs aka critics are busy rolling out their “best of the year” lists, I’d rather stick to my annual tradition of OKS Bollywood awards. These are the most legit of all the awards you’ll be seeing over the next couple of months..because, have a look below.

Now that we have established the seriousness and legitimacy of the awards, sit back, relax and let the envelopes open. We won’t have any Red Carpets, or Item Numbers by starlets. But neither will we have 5 hour awards shows, star tantrums or wannabe celebs walking out on us. That’s the beauty of the OKS Awards. You get it, whether you want it or not. And the categories might seem like they were custom made to fit our egalitarian policy of rewarding everyone *cough* FILMFARE *cough*. But you couldn’t be more wrong. These awards are created and crafted precisely by musical ninja monkeys. Trust the little leaves (see above).

So, Ladies and Gentlemen.. Dil Thaam Ke Baithiye..Pesh Hai..

The OKS Bollywood Music Awards 2011

* Part 1*

Jumping Jack Retro Isshtyle Award :

Ooh Laa Laa – Dirty Picture

It has been a year where Bollywood has pushed the throttle levels for retro. We have seen films named after Dharam paajee’s dance routines (Yamla Pagla Deewana), Aamir doing a hairy Austin Power meets Mithun da (I Hate You Like I Love You) and Salman doing a Raj Kapoor (Character Dheela Hai). But none of them came close to the oomph, the buxom beauty and the bumbaat-ness of Vidya Balan in a pink Apsara costume. Full marks for the matkas, the rolling oranges, the correct placement of thin line moustache on Naseeruddin Shah, and the big drums of course. A perfect blast from the past, Ooh Laa Laa brought back the sassy 70′s n 80′s , and Vishal-Shekhar’s naughty arrangement, along with the playful vocals of Shreya Ghosal and flirtatious Bappi da make it a treat. Never thought that a Palloo could be bechara. 

Dubstep Award:

Bedardi Raja – Delhi Belly (Grind Mix)

In one of the year’s best soundtracks, comes this surprise package. The soundtrack holds enough goodness in pretty much every genre. From rock, to metal, to love ballad, retro, disco, bhangra and even a masala desi track. I do not normally go for dubstep. In fact, I hate it with vengeance. But the desi grind mix of Bedardi Raja is an example of how dubstep could actually work. The calm and addictive groove is taken up a notch by the dubstep elements, and both singer Sona and composer Ram Sampath deserve the Dubstep Mix Award for this.

Burn the Dance Floor Award:

Akon, Vishal-Shekhar, Hamsika Iyer –  Chammak Challo (Ra.One)

It is impossible to dispute the power and the might of Chammak Challo. It is possibly the undisputed grooviest number of the year. But more than that, it is a wonderful example of the technical expertise of composers Vishal-Shekhar.  With blaring techno sounds and a lead singer who sports tinned vocals, Chammak Challo‘s fusion of hip-hop, R&B, Carribean sounds, and even Tamil lyrics, made it an instant hit, not only nationwide, but globally as well. Not even SEL’s Tron inspired beats on Zara Dil Ko Thaam Lo can sway our vote. It deserves this honour.

Axl Rose Lyrics award:

Jaa Chudail – Delhi Belly

Even 3 years ago, I wouldn’t have put my money on Bollywood coming up with something like this. Of course, we have seen Emotional Atyachaar stepping up the game with its raw scream of Bitch. But this year’s Jaa Chudail brings the raw power and hatred that could be found in GnR songs like My Michelle or Used To Love Her. If you think I am exaggerating, have a look at the lyrics below -

Phool vool kuch nahi
Sada hua aalo hai tu
You know what you are
Hoor nahi pari nahi
Jungli ek bhaalu hai tu

Suraj Jaggan’s full volume scream at You know what you are is so reminiscent of Axl Rose, and the pounding drums and the funny picturisation multiplies its sheer insanity. Full marks to lyrics writer Amitabh Bhattacharya and composer Ram Sampath for this Chudail.

Continue To Page 2: For YouTube Award and Music Program of The Year

]]> http://www.oneknightstands.net/oks-bollywood-music-awards-2011-part-1/feed/ 6 http://www.oneknightstands.net/why-this-kolaveri-di-track-review/ http://www.oneknightstands.net/why-this-kolaveri-di-track-review/#comments Sat, 26 Nov 2011 13:07:33 +0000 Sujoy http://www.oneknightstands.net/?p=2584

What more can you write about a song which has currently caught the ears of the nation and beyond. With 5 million+ hits on YouTube, the makers of the movie 3 have certainly hit the jackpot with this extremely simplistic yet infectiously catchy song – Why This Kolaveri Di. Starring Dhanush in the lead role, paired against Shruti Hassan, and directed by Dhanush’s wife, Aishwarya (Rajnikanth’s daughter), the music for the movie is composed by Anirudh, and sound engineered by Sivakumar.

Hit the jump, as we discuss the lyrics, the catchy beat, and try to find out the reason behind – Why This..Why This.. Why This.. Kolaveri Di.

It is brilliant marketing strategy I must say, to release the making video of the track, which sort of gives a behind-the-music look of the craftsmen at work. Dhanush looks absolutely chilled out behind the microphone, and that easily translates into his relaxed voice.

The song: It is written in simple Tanglish (hybrid of Tamil and English), but mostly English words with a suffix of -u It almost makes it a sort of a global song; at least to anyone who can relate to what the lyrics say. It is about a boy who is swept off his feet by the charm of a lady, but as legend would have it, his love is only one way. And this is expressed in as simple terms as possible. The lyrics are pretty much self explanatory, and for your reading pleasure, have been written down below.

Why This Kolaveri Di – Lyrics

yo boys i am singing song
soup song
flop song

why this kolaveri kolaveri kolaveri di
why this kolaveri kolaveri kolaveri dirhythm correct
why this kolaveri kolaveri kolaveri dimaintain this
why this kolaveri..di

distance la moon-u moon-u
moon-u color-u white-u
white background night-u nigth-u
night-u color-u black-u

why this kolaveri kolaveri kolaveri di
why this kolaveri kolaveri kolaveri di

white skin-u girl-u girl-u
girl-u heart-u black-u
eyes-u eyes-u meet-u meet-u
my future dark

why this kolaveri kolaveri kolaveri di
why this kolaveri kolaveri kolaveri di
maama notes eduthuko
apdiye kaila sax eduthukopa
pa paan pa pa paan pa pa paa pa pa paansariya vaasi
super maama ready
ready 1 2 3 4

whaa wat a change over maama
ok maama now tune change-u
kaila glass
only english..

hand la glass
glass la scotch
eyes-u full-aa tear-u
empty life-u
girl-u come-u
life reverse gear-u

lovvu lovvu
oh my lovvu
you showed me bouv-u
cow-u cow-u holi cow-u
i want u hear now-u
god i m dying now-u
she is happy how-u
this song for soup boys-u
we dont have choice-u

why this kolaveri kolaveri kolaveri di
why this kolaveri kolaveri kolaveri di
why this kolaveri kolaveri kolaveri di
why this kolaveri kolaveri kolaveri di
flop song

Meaning of Kolaveri Di - An intense murderous rage. In the context of this song, it speaks of the killer rage which the protagonist faces after rejection. And the boy finds it hard to get in terms with it, trying to find the reasoning behind it. Hence, Why this..Kolaveri Di.

Meaning of Soup Song - A song about failure in love / Soup Boys – Boys who failed in love.

The catchy beat – Full marks to composer Anirudh to have come up with this absolute genius. Simplicity could be one of the most complex things to achieve, and this has been achieved perfectly in this track. Also, the sound engineer Sivakumar deserves a nod here. Brownie points for the groovy fusion which is almost a wicked blend of a hip-hop vibe married with Tamil beats. And for the first time, I didn’t mind the auto-tune either.

Some other points - What is Shruti Hassan doing in the studio? She is seen behind the microphone once, but she doesn’t sing a single line.

OKS Rating – 5 Glass La Scotch Out of 5

And for your viewing pleasure, the video is embedded below.

And if you’ll excuse me for now, let me play this track for the millionth time again.

With the only exception of a mediocre ZNMD, SEL’s last successful soundtrack goes back to early 2010 – My Name Is Khan. And whilst their peers and even newcomers have been busy churning out awesome ballads, hard hitting rock anthems and techno chartbusters, SEL’s 2011 discography list doesn’t sound impressive at all. And that unfortunately does not change much with Don 2. Excel Film’s most anticipated project, and one of this year’s most anticipated release (sometimes I think I use that word a bit way too much), Don 2 does pretty much nothing as a soundtrack. It merely serves as a background score, but even as a background score, it isn’t that good either. The dissection continues after the jump as we discuss the tracks on their own.

#1. Aa Raha Hoon Palat Ke - This is sort of an intro to the album, with a heavy bassed cello arrangement, and SRK doing the honours of announcing his comeback. I don’t see anyone going psyched over this. It even ends with an echo on the Don…Don…Don. Pissed me off. And we are just at Track 1.

#2. Zaraa Dil Ko Thaam Lo - This one feels like it has a “Aaj Ki Raat” hangover, and well, just so that you don’t forget it’s a Don movie, SEL have inserted the looped Don theme throughout. I like the funky electro arrangement, and the chorus – Zaraa Dil Ko Thaam Lo, is catchy. Anusha Mani’s silky vocals are deceptively close to Sunidhi Chauhan, and so is the case with Vishal Dadlani who sounds more like Shankar. The strings sections are reminiscent of a Bond situation, and I guess that was what was intended – to make Don a spy/ international criminal franchise. To me, this is the strongest track in the album. No wonder they released this in the trailers first.

#3. Hai Ye Maya - This track sounds like some montage piece to me, and could possibly be an end credits title, or a sneaky track inserted between Don’s crime deals, set in Monte Carlo or Macau. There’s the obvious words thrown in the mix such as – Dhokha, Dushman, Pehchaan, Aankhein.. and all that. I am not going crazy over Usha Uthup’s vocals (considering I love her as an artist), but I love the use of the horns section. It does give it a very crime movie feel.

#4. Dushman Mera - It is with this track that you feel that SEL has given up on this soundtrack. Sounds like they’ve been underpaid or something. Paired with Sunitha Sarathy, Shankar has some very mediocre lyrics to play with. And the arrangement is very reminiscent of the many crime capers of 80′s set in the dockyards of Mumbai. Y’know, the ones with smugglers, importing-exporting boxes of charas and all that. Yes, I know the original Don is one of those movies. But even as a hat tip to that genre, this track is really weak. This made me so bored that I fell asleep during it.. twice.

#5. The King is Back (Theme) - Just so you don’t forget to worship the ‘King’, this track does the task to remind you of that. An Enya-esque intro fades in into a groovy mix of electro and punk rock cymbals crashing.  Love the mixing, and the editing done on this. There’s a calm piano and strings section as well, which surprisingly sounded to me like THAT theme music from HDDCS. But that doesn’t linger on, coz we are thrown back to the distorted guitars and the drum pedals again. This completely works for me.

#6. Mujhko Pehchaanlo - A reprise of the title track from the previous movie, but SEL have decided to ditch Shaan, and recuit KK instead. It’s more miss than hit for me. Shaan would’ve been a better choice. The strings arrangement make it sound like a Bond soundtrack meets a casino movie – like Ocean’s Eleven, or even Casino Royale. I can imagine  sweeping shots of the Bellagio or shimmery slot machines. Or am I hallucinating? Good thing though, is that this is over sooner than you realise it.

#7. Hai Ye Maya (remix) - Now I often tend to hate remixes, and there’s no exception with this. It just gives me a feeling that the composer ran out of creative juice, and handed over his master track to a DJ, so that he can rape it. And whoever mixed this, has done a very good job with that. The seizure inducing dubstep influences are very much there, and I’d suggest, if you care about your ears, stay the fuck away from this.

#8. Mujhko Pehchaanlo (remix) - Whoever threw the “Don Ko Pakadna Mushkil..” on a loop, deserves one of those One-Tight-Slaps. Just bloody annoying. Skip.

#9. The Don Waltz - I am imagining this will be some sort of a hotel dance scene showcasing SRK’s expertise with the Waltz. Cue – Terence Lewis choreography. Nothing more for me here.

So that was the track list discussed.

Strongest tracks – Zaraa Dil Ko Thaam Lo, The King Is Back.

Everything else ranges from mediocre to downright shite.

OKS Rating – 1.5 Dhishkow Out of 5

And since, there hasn’t been much entertainment derived out of the soundtrack, I have decided to take matters in my own hands. Presenting, …

MOVING POSTER OF DON 2

Need I write any intro to this one. The title is pretty self explanatory. In the 20 years or so of Indipop [ that's a fair assumption right? ], we’ve had some really massive hits. But once in a while, there comes a hit to sweep all of us off our feet. And then, we don’t get to hear of that artiste ever again. Until they appear in regional channels judging (and in some cases – hosting and even participating ) reality TV shows, or appear in the left corner of some Page 3 party. So either they get busy in the scripted reality, or get seriously involved becoming social. Doesn’t matter where they eventually ended up, this list explores ..

The 10 ‘One Hit Wonders’ of Indipop.

10. Paisa – Agosh

Such a shame that this band churned out just a single hit when it showed so much promise with this single. The video is a very clever parody of the many flavours of brands consuming our lives. A very smart take on consumerism, Paisa, or as you would remember – Mujhe Mil Jo Jaaye Thoda Paisa – is narrated by an unsuccessful Kavi, sitting in a tea-stall, and speaks of what he’d do if he had money. His desires range from celebrating Sunday from Friday night, decorating his car with Disco light, having a beautiful Biwi, and even his Kids would have their own TV (noble thought). But the most simple, yet beautiful line here is – Hum bhi honge unke jaise ( We’d also be like THEM ) – Kind of shows the frustration of the struggling lower middle class, which looks at the ridiculous affluence of the high society and its glam sham. Musically, this is a brilliant fusion of rock and Carnatic – listen to the sweet Guitar solo. Very very awesome!! [ Video Link ]

The list continues after the jump.

9. Kahin Karta Hoga – Anamika

Almost 4 feet something Anamika, splashed on our TV screens, and every channel beamed this song. What I didn’t realise then was that this is a remix of a very old Biswajeet song from the movie Phir Kab Milogi (1974), originally sung by Mukesh. The new version features a high heeled Anamika trying to do a sort of a Swayamvar and trying to select from Red Indians, to Kung Fu masters, to futurustic Robots? And finally settling for a Desi dude – kyunki – Jaanii, Dil Hai Hindustani !! Unfortunately, we did not hear back from Anamika after that – perhaps, she lived happily ever after with some desi dude. Oh, she did make some appearances as guest judge on Boogie Woogie, and a minor hit remix of - Se Hooooo Tumko Piya, Dil Diya Kitne Naaz Se, but that video disappeared like Tushaar Kapoor’s PR manager. [Video Link]

8. Ae Sanam – Abbey

This video created a rage of jerking heads throughout the nation. If you have seen the video, followed it back then, and the parody created by the Jaffreys n Behl trio, you’d certainly know what I mean by the jerking head. If you haven’t, try watching the video, and I think it is pretty obvious. The track is a very groovy techno mix and Abbey’s vocals are crunchy, rough and crisp. The non-stop unedited feel in the video, shot in a steel manufacturing factory was a trendsetter back then. And this was also the launch vehicle for Abbey, who went on to sing the male vocals on RGV’s Company hit item number – Khallas. But what happened of Abbey after this? [Video Link]

7. Ek Rahen Eeer – Big B

Not even Big B could escape the curse of the One Hit Wonder. The album Aby-Baby remixed by Bally Sagoo was a big hit. And its two highly promoted singles were the talk of the nation then. One of them - Kabhi Kabhi - a remix of the Sahir Ludhianvi/ Khayyam / Lata Mangeshkar original mixed with Big B’s narration of the poem featured in the movie. The second hit single – Ek Rahen Beer, is a poem written by Mr.Bachchan’s father – Harivansh Rai Bachchan. It basically featured Big B rapping in the video about these three kids – Eer, Beer, and Phatte and their many exciting adventures. Choreographed by Prabhudeva’s brother Raju Sundaram, and directed by Rakeysh Omprakash Mehra, the video’s stylish presentation and interesting special effects were nothing less than brilliant. It was also the time when Big B’s BPL ads were doing the rounds on telly (remember, him walking out Piccadilly Circus, and then on the roof, speaking of Believing in the Best? ). But after the success of Aby Baby, Big B has not done another album, or even a single. [ Well, he sorta did a collaboration with Adnan Sami on Kabhi Naee.. but meh! ] [Video Link]

6. Chandu Ke Chacha – Aasma

Channel V’s second popstars with the Kudi aur Mundo ka funda fizzed for a while. At least with the initial release of first album. Imagine, months long audition process to select the nation’s best popstar group, and then you end up singing – Chandu Ke Chacha Ne , Chandu ki Chacha Ko… how lame! No wonder, this was a big hit. The only thing that was memorable about the whole Aasma episode of Channel V popstars was Simpoo Sir’s ads of the Popstar – with the awesome aping of Kumar Sanu’s nasal notes (see video here), and the Kudi aur Munda, Popstars ka Naya Funda. Everything else was meh! Aasma did try to follow up with a single for the OST of White Noise – Mere Saiya Mere Balma. Does anyone remember that?
[P.S. I haven't included Viva here, because they at least had a respectable second album with that awesome techno track - Ye Pyar Nahi to Kya Hai Jaana ] [Video Link]

5. Mohabbatein Lutaunga – Abhijit Sawant

Speaking of reality talent hunt shows, why forget the most popular one – Indian Idol. I know there have been a lot of products from these shows who are forgotten faster than Rakhi Sawant’s last national breaking news headline comment. Be it Debojit Saha, Onek Dhar, Toshi, Rahul Vaidya, Qazi Touqeer, Ruprekha, Prajakta Shukre – the list is endless. But of course, the crown in this genre has to go to the one to begin it all – Abhijit Sawant. As the first Indian Idol, he arrived with a bang with that ‘oh-I-am-so-obliged-to-be-here’ song ‘Mohabbatein Lutaunga’. The nation certainly took notice. He toured and toured cities, towns, villages, in India and abroad. And round 1 was completed. Nothing cool came up for Round 2 unfortunately. Abhijit Sawant since then, was seen in Reality TV shows – competing, hosting and singing in between – onstage, and even in drag. [Video Link]

4. O O Jaane Jana – Kamaal Khan

This one was a rage of national proportions. London return, Kamaal Khan’s catchy guitar melody caught the ears of the nation and he was a national phenomenon after that. His track was also given the Bollywood treatment, now famous as that shirtless song. A second single from the same album followed – Kya Yehi Pyar Hai. And then Kamaal Khan was never to be seen in the Indipop circle. His second single – Suno To Deewana Dil featured Riya Sen , but never managed to climb the heights of Indipop charts. He can be heard these days playbacking in certain Salman Khan movies such as – Maine Pyar Kyu Kiya (Laga Laga Laga Re). Just for fun, check this out – Sonu Nigam mocking Kamaal Khan [Video Link]

3. Breathless – Shankar Mahadevan

Ok, this is here just because of technicality. Of course we are surrounded by the music and melody of Shankar and the trio – Shankar/ Ehsaan / Loy. But for Shankar as a solo pop artist – this was it. His single attempt at being a solo artist was accompanied by Javed Akhtar’s lyrics. The song speaks of the ‘one’ which brings colourful changes to one’s life – Koi Jo Mila To Mujhe Aisa Lagta Tha, Jaise Meri Sari Duniya Mein Geeto ki Rut, Aur Rango ki Barkha hai, Khushboo ki Aandhi hai

(Attempt at translation: When I met that ‘one’, I felt as if my whole world was in a climate of music, there is a rain of colours and a storm of fragrance) – - awesome foreplay with words don’t you think?

Such a shame that the duo – Javed saab and Shankar did not attempt at going independent and non-Bollywood soundtrack again. The occasional collaboration of Shankar with other artistes such as Alka Yagnik or Taufiq Qureshi (Rhydhun , oh man! I need to get back to listening Rhydhun again ) have given us some really memorable melodies, but c’mon, don’t you think a solo album again by Shankar would be so awesome? [Video Link]

2. Ho Gayi Hai Mohabbat – Aslam , no Shibani

This is again one of those lucky tracks to have enjoyed maximum airplay in its prime. Featuring Shibani Kashyap and a very muscular Nakul Kapoor ( then famous as the bungee jumping Thums up dude ), the video to this song was shot in the picturesque backwaters of Kerala (Alleppey?). And then, the cheesy storyline to accompany the lyrics – Girl taking dips in the sea, boy sees girl (gets turned on), but to avoid being termed a pervy, wears a black glass and poses to be blind. Girl accidentally bumps into boy later to find out boy is not blind and argues. Later, girl sees boy helping small girl, and gets so impressed that she falls for him. Wait wait…whaaaa????  And then, they pose in extreme hues of blue, much like a Kamasutra condom ad. Ok, no time for arguments here; the video is only 5 mins long. And oh, there are some angrezi lyrics to end the song too.
But yaar, what happened to Aslam after this? Shibani had him with Ketchup  [Video Link ]

1. Chui Mui Si – Milind Ingle

The father of all One-Hit-Wonders. This one comes from the house of Rajshri Productions – yes, the one who gave us Maine Pyar Kiya and Hum Aapke Hai Kaun (and everything after that never happened , NEVER HAPPENED !!!). In true Rajshri productions style, this musical movie was revealed with each song serving as a 5 minute episode of the big wedding video. Featuring Abbas and Preeti Jhangiani and the clip teddy bear ( awarded the 1st runner up merchandise of all time, second to – the Friends cap in Maine Pyar Kiya ), this video is usual Bollywood fare. Oh, I completely forgot to mention – Milind Ingle. He sort of made an appearance after Ye Hai Prem ( the album where Chui Mui Si features ), singing a track called – Main to hu ek rasiyaa (which sank like 15 Rakhi Sawants tied to one Ravi Kishan and a massive stone). But none of us can deny the amount of cultural uproar and impact that Ye Hai Prem (as an album) and Chui Mui Si ( as a pop video) had on us. It catapulted the career of Preeti Jhangiani until she decided to throw it all away by doing movies such as Chaahat: Ek Nasha and Aan: Men At Work. We still are quite optimistic of yet another musical episodic saga from the house of Rajshri to invade our screen space. [Video Link]

So there you go, those were the 10 one hit wonders of the Indipop world. I am sure I have missed some. Shout it out in the comments, and for a change, please show some love – Retweet, share on Facebook, Digg, stumble. Come on!! Don’t be shy my honey! Oh Rouge – dammit. Maybe next time.