Some of you might know of this that I am right now on a holiday back home. Home means apna des, India. Specifically for me, it is Silchar, Assam, where the grass is still green and not quite polluted by the carbon monoxide in the air, and the roads are not so pretty. Vacation means feasting on the various dishes that I have been deprived of since my last visit (which was last year), sleeping at odd hours, meeting relatives, names of whom I don’t remember or I just don’t care to do so, and finally watching shitty television.

The state of the Indian television has declined drastically over the last few years, and I don’t feel any sort of apprehension in declaring that it needs a radical change in the form of entertainment that is being produced to cater to audiences. While Indian cinema has grown by leaps and bounds in producing not only popcorn and candyfloss entertainers (even though most have the same recycled storylines), but also independent and original storylines, Indian television seems to be stuck in the bottom of a black hole whose gravity has sucked out all its creativity, and all that is left is the cud for all its viewers to chew on and on.  Let me bring to your attention these points.

1. Soaps and Serials (Culprits – Star Plus, Colors, Zee TV)

My mother is an active participant of a fanclub spanning across the nation’s millions of households, where the lady has the control over the remote, and the remote is set to these no-brainer series which seem like an extended version of Hum Aapke Hai Kaun, spiced up with elements of eersha, shadyantra, maryada, rishtey and parampara, with an overdose of hamming up which would even make Suraj Barjatya go – Nahiiiiiiiiii. All of this began with the rise of the Virani family (Kyunki Saans Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi aka KSBKBT), which has spread its wings and spawned its millions of clones across channels, in various vernacular flavours. With KSBKBT, the format of the Mon-Thu run of soaps became the standard fare, and that meant – snail-paced plots and dialogues written to expand through emotions and predicaments of even the ‘maali’ of the house ( the gardener), who actually happens to be the illegitimate father of the only son of the family. With more facepalm moments than ever imaginable, these soaps and serials have one thing in common – the occurrence of a thunderous sound pause and a close-up shot moment for every pivotal character to ponder upon his/her paap in the past. There is only one reason why these soaps and serials continue to be made -  to torture the future generation of this country and for people like me to keep ridiculing them. And btw, has COLORS bought the movie Dabangg on a long term contract, so that they can broadcast it every Sunday?

2. Hindi News (Click the pic above for the News video)

It is ok for tabloid channels like Zoom to discuss at length about the linkups, breakups and party fashion of celebrities and starlets who hardly appear onscreen otherwise. But when proper news channels of the likes of IBN7, Zee News and Aaj Tak focus on tabloid journalism to take a major chunk of their one hour news bulletin, you know its time to change the channel, or even better – switch off the telly. e.g. A regular evening bulletin on Aaj Tak was headlined – Ranbir Ne Maangi Maafi, Diya Apne Linkups ki Safaai ( Ranbir apologised, and gave explanation about his linkups). The question was raised by this Aaj Tak reporter at a launch event of Panasonic TV endorsed by Ranbir Kapoor and Diya Mirza. The reporter jumped over the microphone to ask this question, and Ranbir said – I am very sorry, I feel bad that everywhere I get linked up with anyone. Please do not do so. The reporter shows a smug smile, and takes pride that he succeeded in his mission. And I feel sorry for the state of Indian news to have considered this as a real story. To all the dudes running News channels, we don’t need this shit. We don’t need to know who farted where and who is having dinner with whom and where. I also feel sorry for myself to have watched it, and now I feel sorry to have written about it. Damn!

3. MTV (Roadies, well there’s nothing else left of MTV)

There was a time when MTV meant Music Television. I don’t think that definition holds good anymore. With episodes of Roadies on air 24/7, the only other thing that airs on MTV are the teaser trailers of forthcoming releases. And besides Roadies, there is that other show – Roadies Making, and the other show where the voted out roadie and Raghu give some bol bachan on life and shit. Frankly, who gives a rat’s ass anymore. The only interesting thing about the Roadies are the auditions because like them, or hate them, the twins – Raghu and Rajeev, have a good way of testing people. But that is all. The creative team of MTV hit the jackpot with Roadies, and just like the plague on its international avatar – Jersey Shore, Roadies seems like will keep haunting us for a few more years.

4. HBO, Star Movies, AXN, Star World

When the fuck are these channels arriving in HD? And what the fuck is the deal with those annoying subtitles. There should be an option with DTH systems to be able to disable those annoying texts. That’s all.

5.  IPL

The only saving grace, and the only reason why I can bear staring at the TV screen these days is because in between the breaks of the stupid serials on COLORS, my mother allows me and my dad to switch to Max to watch the IPL. Twenty-Twenty is a lovely format for cricket, and although I couldn’t care less who wins and who loses, every time I see the ball being hit for a six, it feels good.

The only shows that I think are watchable are -

Star Plus – Comedy Ka Maha Mukabla

Zee TV – Dance India Dance

Other little things I noticed -

a.  Star One has a series on Vampires, inspired by Twilight/ Buffy . Dunno, never tried watching them.

b. CID on Sony is still going strong. Daya and Inspector Pradyumna are still together (like in a crime fighting  way).

c. Nobody watches Sahara One, SAB TV ( not even Tarak Mehta Ka Oolta Chashma), Star Utsav, NDTV Imagine etc.

d. There is a Bhojpuri version of KBC about to start on Mahua Channel (not kidding), and it possibly is going to feature Ravi Kishan on the quizmaster’s chair (speculation).

e. There are more Bengali channels than I can count. Star Jalsha has TV serials which look and feel like Balaji serials set in Kolkata, with characters speaking slow motion Bengali, occasionally paused by their inner thoughts and a drum beat of passion.

f. India TV was banned by cable operators in Silchar, due to complaints from customers about obscene content ( from a respectable source). India TV is available on DTH.

g. Thankfully, there’s no Rakhi Sawant on TV for now.

Concluding this post, I want to state that I am still annoyed with these serials featuring lead old ladies speaking with a fake Haryanvi / Rajasthani accent, their joint families living in palatial fortresses, and women in the families having nothing better to do than spy on each other and literally contest for the attention of the same man – that man, speaks in idioms and phrases and sleeps and wakes up with a tilak. How do I know so much ? Because I am subjected to this torture of watching these serials by my mother. Is that what Parampara is all about? Shame on you TV studios and serial makers.

One of the most controversial movies of its time, Shekhar Kapur’s Bandit Queen is a disturbing tale, in general of the oppressed low caste, and of their women in particular, in the illiterate rural parts of India. The movie begins with a quote from the Manu Smriti which reads – The low caste, the drums and women should be beaten. A statement like that in the 21st century sends shockwaves, but such a thing still exists in India, and we do get to hear about it, lost between the headlines of corruption scandals and honour killings. The director emphasises this is a true story.

**Spoilers ahead**

Told through the narrative of the protagonist Phoolan Devi, the story maps her journey from being subjected to child marriage to becoming an easy victim of nymphomaniac Thakurs who oppress her, her family. The Thakurs accuse her of being a slut, and on those grounds she is thrown away from her village and away from her family. Phoolan joins a bandit gang, falls in love with one of the bandits Vikram Mallah, who kills the gang leader Gujjar, and becomes gang leader himself. But the Thakurs who fund and run the bandits, kill Vikram, and gangrape Phoolan and make her walk through the village naked. Phoolan then meets a friend of Vikram, Mann Singh, with whom she sets up yet another gang to take revenge upon the Thakurs.

The elements described in this tale come very close to make me cringe and create a very uncomfortable feeling in my stomach. Yes, I have seen many gory films, but there is nothing more cringe worthy than seeing an 11 year old being raped by her own husband, even if it is depicted in a suggestive way. I don’t know what sort of an adjective or noun would best describe the horror and trauma of a gang-rape, and the utter shame that one faces when told to walk through the village stark naked. And this is done to her by the heads of the village – the Thakurs ( the higher caste) while the remaining village joins in as spectators. Phoolan’s life is filled with such traumatic events. But does that justify her streak of rampant bloodshed in the name of vengeance? I don’t know. May be yes, it does. But what about the innocent Thakurs who got killed by Phoolan in frustration of not finding the two Thakurs responsible for her gang rape? Did they deserve it, just because they belonged to the same caste?

The 1980s were a turbulent time in the Indian law and order system. Just a few years back India had recovered from emergency. And rural India was still miles away from finding its law and order in place. The sarpanch and his panchayat’s decision was the one to abide by. And that meant, decisions made by the rich and the oppressors of the society, in favour of themselves. Well, that hasn’t really changed worldwide, has it?

But I do feel glad after watching Shekhar Kapur’s Bandit Queen. The realisation that I live in a world surrounded by people who respect women as they should be, is an assurance of the evolution of the society in the right direction. Kapur’s compelling visuals, especially in the scenes involving child Phoolan are disturbing and engaging at the same time. The line between reel and real becomes very blurred and if only for that, Shekhar Kapur deserves a big pat on his back. Like Deepa Mehta’s Water, a similar tale of women oppression and the manipulative caste-division, Bandit Queen is a story which needed to be told.

Seema Biswas won the National Award for Best Actress amongst all the controversy. Late Nirmal Pandey’s effortless embodiement of the rural dacoit Vikram Mallah, reminds us of the powerful actor we will miss. Ashok Mehta’s cinematography sets the tone pitch perfect – from the dark nights lit by candles and oil lamps to the dry scorching desert searching for a drop of water, to the reflection of the sun in the river water. It is a treat to watch Ashok Mehta create his wonders through the lens. And finally, Nusrat Fateh Ali Khan’s immortal score to this tale makes it rise to the levels of a cinema classic.

Watch it you must, but not with family. This one’s for one of those evenings when you want to ponder upon something about the world around you, and feel fortunate.

Statutory Warning: All events depicted in this post are fictitious and deliciously humorous. If you do believe that these are real, then you should join the OKS Club as a co-writer. If you found this offensive, then please read news websites instead. There’s more offending stuff there to keep you busy.

Lemme begin with a the wise words of the world famous in India, vet Bhatavlekar – It is a true. What is? That Sheila ki Jawani has made me ‘Rumaani’. Thank you, thank you! Just when you thought Munni could not get any more badnaam, Farah and Katrina have teamed up alongside Sunidhi and Vishal to steam up with a chart topper. But enough about that item song. We at OKS control room are more geared up and loaded than ever more. This is all making no sense. It happens when anyone sees the following.

Meanwhile in Delhi, this wasn’t received very well. Especially with Suresh Kalmadi ( citation required). When the word spread about the existence of a certain song dedicated to the Chief Minster’s jawaani, the DMC hosted a big bash in her honour. Picture below.

But somewhere far away, in a living room…

EUPHORIA !!! The word itself fills my thoughts with splashes of colours and happiness. And that’s how Euphoria’s music is  - vibrant, melodic, beautiful and very Indian, and not in a dumbed-down way. And along with the upbeat songs of the folk genre, they have also some really heartwarming love ballads and even Qawwalis. Euphoria’s spectrum of music genre is spread wide and can be defined only as what Palash calls it – Hind Rock! And each of their videos has a story to tell, a proper story, like a mini-movie of sorts.

For the uninitiated, the band line-up as of now is :

Back row: Palash Sen (lead vocalist, standing)
Front row L to R: Ashwini(drums), Benny (Keyboard), Irshad(dholak and percussions), DJ Bhaduri (Bass Guitar),
Reshu (dholak and percussions), Hitesh (Guitars).

I, personally, have seen them perform live once at my college campus (NIT Silchar), and there is only one thing which I want to say bout it. Man, they performed for almost 3 hours straight. And what a flawless set. They sing their favorites from the albums released so far, and apart from that do covers as well such as – Another One Bites the Dust, Every Breath You Take and Smoke on the Water. It has been almost 4 years now since that concert, and I can still vividly remember the wild fun that I had.  And so,  in memory of that awesome one wild night, here I list down 10 of my favourite Euphoria songs.

10. Raja Rani

This begins with a high pitched Palash belting out a Rajasthani folksy lyrical syllable. The instruments used are also reminiscent of Rajasthani folk. And so is the video, which is filled with beautiful deserts, puppets, colorful turbans and a cutesy love story. And the lyrics has elements of national integration – Multani, Bangaali, Dogra. How can you not love this?

9. Gully

Just sheer fun. Right from the intro clinging of the metal ring, to the catchy chorus catch-phrase – Tak Dhina Dhin. In a picturesque video directed by Pradeep Sarkar which highlights his signature desi style. So there’s the hustle-bustle of a dulhan-walle ghar with the pandals, the light arrangements and garlands strewn across. And then there’s Vidya Balan playing the coy and shy bride who almost gets married to the greedy family. But our hero Palash dude gets to the rescue and saves the day. Guru phataphaati!! Yep, one of the catchy phrases generated by this song. The playful lyrics are a delight e.g. Kya karegi tu Kashmir Jaake, Swarg tera yaha..

8. Sha Na Na

One of the overlooked and underappreciated songs from their first album, Sha Na Na is a solid pop rock song replete with guitars, bass and rolling drums and contains a very funky chorus line which you can sing all day long. And yes, that’s Neha Dhupia in the video before her Miss India, and then Julie days.

Pyar ka Jadoo Chal Gaya…
Main Deewana ho gaya..
Ooo yeah! Chodo tum satana..
Ooo yeaah!! Mat karo tum na na na na..
Sha Na na Na ..

7. Ab Na Jaa

The first ballad on this list. Let’s forget the video for a bit. And lend our ears to the lyrical words which are woven beautifully to Benny’s piano melody.

Aankhen Bandh kar lu jo main..Dekhu bas tumhe
Khwabo Mein hi keh sakta hu, Apna tumhe
Rehne de, Mera ye Vehem pe hi Yakeen
Na jaa abhi..
Pyar ki ye raat hai, ab na jaa
Chhoti si ek baat hai, ab na jaa
Pal do pal ka saath hai, ab na jaa
Jaadu si ye raat hai, ab na jaa

[Translation:
I close my eyes and I can only see you
Its only in my dreams that I can say you're mine
Let me keep on believing in this misbelief
Don't go now
Its the night of love, don't go now
There's something I want to say, don't go now
This togetherness is short, don't go now
Its a magical night, don't go now]

6. Mehfuz

When Gulzar saab teams up with Euphoria, the result is no lesser than perfection. Mehfuz is one of Euphoria’s masterpieces because of its melancholy tone perfected by the musical arrangement – the flute and the slow bass tune which haunts even after the song is long finished.

And the lyrics – sigh! Have a go at this.

Phir bhi banke nishaan tere honthon ke kisi konon main hasi ki tarah main mehfuz hoon

[Translation: Even then, as a mark, like a smile on some corner of your lips, I am safe. ]

5. Tum

Ok, this one is hands down the best ballad written in Indipop. The video is quite tragic like most of Euphoria videos which involve the death of the female protagonist ( on more than one occassion). I guess Palash or one of the band members has suffered from such a loss. Bless! Coming back to the song, the lyrics are just top notch. Check this out -

Pehli saas, Mere din ki pehli dhoop
Tum Chand ki pehli kiran
Pehla Geet, Baarish ki pehli boond,
Tum sheet ki pehli kampann

Usne Bheja tumhein mere liye
Suune dil ki tum dhadkan

Saanso mein jo mere khwabo mein jo, wo ho tum
Yaado mein jo, meri aankho mein jo, wo ho tum

[ Translation:
The first breath, The first sunshine of my day
You are the first ray of the moonlight
The first song, The first droplet of the rain
You are the first shiver of winter

He sent you for me
You are the beat in my lonely heart

The one in my breath, the one in my dreams, that's you
The one in my memories, the one in my eyes, that's you]

4. Dhoom

The one that started it all. And I love everything about it. The folk elements juxtaposed brilliantly with the heavy sliding bass of DJ Bhaduri, and the awesome jugalbandhi with Shubha Mudgal’s bengali Majhee song. SD Burman would have been very happy if he heard this. And to top it all, Pradeep Sarkar’s opulent presentation set in Banaras filled with Gulal, the Ganges and gorgeous model -

Love it..to bits. Sujoy = Dhoom pichucked!

3. Waise Hi

Now this is what I would call stuff of geniuses. It starts off with a crunchy guitar solo and you’d expect a rock song to come out of it. But then it mellows down and before you know it, voila, its a Qawwali. And not just any random one. The solo on this song was performed on Abida Parveen’s Dumadum Mast Kalander when Euphoria collaborated with Rahat Fateh Ali Khan. And I wish they had included at least a section of this song.

This has all the elements to make it an awesome qawwali, needless to mention the gradual picking up of the tempo and the mood of the song. And to top it all, Palash in a naughty way blurts out – So does this surprise you baby? Hehe!

This has no video unfortunately, but for your listening pleasure, I have embedded the audio file below.

Saanse chah kar bhi rukti nahi,
Aise hee jeena hai to, yahee Sahi..
Dil to dhadakta hai aise hi
Muskurata bhi hu main, waise hi..

2. Mantra

The first single to be released in the history of Indipop. And this one pretty much defines what Euphoria is all about. The lyrics are reminiscent of every rock number and yet they do not sound like a cheap copy/translation of an English rock song. Its positive, ambitious and most importantly smart. And also, Hitesh’s guitar solo after the second verse is one of the most awesome guitar pieces on any Indian album.

But what makes this track on no.2 is the solid intro instrumental which is an awesome jugalbandi between the guitars, drums, the tabla and Palash Sen’s screaming vocals.

And the inspirado lyrics go something like..

Jeet kya aur haar kya
Gham aur khushi ke paar kya
Hai Megh ke aasar kya
Toofan kya, Majhdhaar kya

Hai Baadlo ke paar kya
Gham aur khushi ke paar kya
Bas jan lo hai pyaar kya
Ye mera Mantra…

1. Maaeri

I don’t think any of you will disagree with the choice of this song as the no. 1. And over the years, it has become almost the anthem of every desi college lover.

The intro lyrics – Teriya Meriya Poool Gaya
Pool Gaya Haar de jeet
Hee Maaye, Main Jeetnu
Hove naa je Meet

I have forgotten about you and me
I have forgotten about loss and victory
Oh mother, what victory is a win
If I don’t have my love with me

Reemi Sen’s earthy looks do wonders to the video. The toothpaste on the nose, the railway-track pressed coin, the station tea shop, and the busy compartment in a train rattling through the foggy villages – all visuals which depict so much in each and every frame than most movies can possibly can. And the story of love kurbaan-ified by the zaleem duniya aka Ladki ke Mummy Daddy. I tell you, they should be mummified with a ‘lep’ (layer) of Mirch Achaar (Chilli Pickle).

So there you go. Those are my top 10 pick for the Euphoria playlist. I know a lot of you will be disagreeing to this, and questioning and possibly pelting stones at my window for excluding – Phir Dhoom, Bewafa, etc etc. C’mon people, only 10 spots. But you do have the comments section to let your outburst get out there. But please, behave.

Band Image courtesy: Dhoom.com

And because I am so awesome, here’s a grooveshark playlist with 6 of the 10 songs (couldn’t find the rest).

Hey there! This is the last post in the India’s Got Talent series this season. Thankfully, the space of the 10 finalists on the Grand Finale got increased by 1 – Thanks to the Judges Wild Card entry. In the Wild Card Entry special, out of the 6 contestants who battled it out, my favorite – Aslam Khan Langa Group got selected. The previous night , which was the Independence Day Special, saw 6 special acts showcasing their talents to become the India’s Got Talent show-stealer- Bharat ki Shaan. The acts which competed that night included amongst others, Illuminati [ aka the Super Mario act ], Soham Brass Band from Delhi and . The criteria for selection of these acts is unknown, but yes the motive was clear. After the online adulation and success achieved by Illuminati, the producers – BIG Synergy wanted to show some sort of acceptance to the Illuminati Group – and very rightly so.

Coming back to the Grand Finale – Ayushman and Nikhil were dressed in their best of suits, and so were the judges. The stage was set, and the acts were about to be unveiled.Here we go. ***Lotsa screenshots after the jump.**

Act 1: Sneha and Richard

Salsa made it to the National Finals. Quite a big thing, isn’t it. And yes, they deserved every bit of it. They even showed a bit of Daredevil Stunt in their dance show-off. Bravo! Have a look at the Judges reaction.

Act 2: Piyush and the Fine Tuners.

They are a Indian fusion music act – and not so surprisingly in their Intro, we get the background music to be – Indian Ocean’s -Maa Rewa. But they are far behind that level. The band is great, except the vocalist – the dude who named it after himself -Piyush. He is completely out of tune. In the auditions, semi-finals and in the finals too. And yes, gimmicks do work, and I am not complaining. People ‘use’ issues of the Nation viz. Mumbai Terrorist attacks of last year- and it would have been really beautiful, if the bloke could SING. I am surprised by the results – not in a good way.

Act 3: Prince Dance Group, from Behrampur, Orissa.

The group which gave us Shree Krishna, and then the National Flag- Tricolor act. All eyes were on this particular act. The question was, will they be able to outperform their previous performance. The answer is Yes, and in what style. They performed Dashavatar, and it spelt Grandiose in every single move. It was a Magnum Opus. Just have a look at the many Screens below. Definite winners.

Act 4:Satyajit Padhye

Honestly, his act was a bit flawed. There was an environmental message, clubbed with a few glittering choreography too. But the script wasn’t as crisp as before. But yeah, he did make us chuckle by making the baby puppet call Ayushman – Daddy!! Look at the reactions from the judges.

Act 5: Aslam Khan Langa Group

One of my favorites to win the show. They performed – Damadam Mast Kalander – made famous by Abeeda Parveen and Nusrat Fateh Ali Khan. I just can’t stop dancing when Qasim takes the stage, and makes every one sway in their trance. Just love them. It was perfect!

Act 6: Rajesh Amrale

The Malkhamb guy. His act was brilliantly choreographed, and with more dangerous act. Yes, there was a stage mishap, but he carried on. Funny thing was, after such a tiring and demanding act, the audience shouted “Once more”. Yeah, like he’s gonna do that once more just for you Mr. The act was awesomely, breathtakingly, dangerously good. Have a look at the judges’ breathless reactions.

Act 7: Mandeep Singh and Group

This Bhangra Dance Group did what they do best – Bhangra. Explosively youthful and absolutely energetic. Vibrant colors and loud dhols. My Dil said Hadippa.

Act 8: Vaishnavi Patil

The little-cute-smiley girl who enthralled us with her audition dance to Shankar’s “Breathless” chose to perform on another Shankar song – Man Mohini from Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam [ yea...the music is by Ismail Darbar, but can you imagine anyone else singing it]. Her performance was ok, compared to her previous acts. I even liked her “Monjulikaa” act more than this one. Brownie points for the Moon-landing sequence though!

Act 9: Lokmanya Sanskritik Nyas, Ujjain

Ropes, Upscaled stunts, Platforms set on glasses – all of these spelled danger in every move they performed. And they were flawless. But my problem is with the cameraman dude. I could not enjoy this performance as much as I could because of the gibberish imagery that was on display. Really bad editing as well. Lovely act!

Act 10: M-Sonic from Guwahati, Assam

Mainak’s voice is brilliant. They have performed – Teri Deewani by Kailash Kher, A.R.Rahman – Maa Tujhe Salaam; and in the Grand Finale, they performed – Nusrat Fateh Ali Khan’s – Piya Re. Not only did he sing it flawlessly, the band did an improvised rock twist to the song cover. BRILLIANT. If there was a prize for the best musical talent on this show, it goes to M-Sonic.

Act 11: Rohan Dance Group

From Nala Supara to New York; Shekhar Kapoor corrects it to: From Nala Supara to New York. And he’s very correct. Brilliant is the word. Awesome choreography, and flawless execution. As Sonali sez referring to Shekhar Kapoor – Mogambo indeed Khush Hua.

Now, once the performances got over, the bakar-ch@#$ commenced. You know, killing time to get the votes tallied. Some reality TV ‘Star’ – Sambhavna something performed to Aaja Nachle – and her dance was yuck! Really! Vaishnavi would pin her down with just a single move. And then came the Fear Factor gals. And then there was yet another performance by a not-so-annoying TV starlet – Shweta Salve. What annoys me about talent shows now is that, it is a collaborative, mutually beneficial enterprise. And this is not just an Indian phenomenon. We have FOX promoting their blockbuster exclusive trailers on American Idol etc etc.

And on IGT- we get to hear a lot of chanting of the sponsors – by Ayushman, and then the promotion of their next upcoming shows – Fear Factor and De Dhana Dhan. Trivia: The host of the show:De Dhana Dhan – Sharat Saxena, played Daaga in Shekhar Kapoor’s Mr.India. And well, we have the special prize distribution ceremony with Bollywood celebrities cum Movie promotion – Shahid Kapoor and Rani Mukherjee promoting ‘Dil Bole Hadippa’. Yawn Yawn Yawn!

And after a long wait, and Nikhil Chinappa uttering every word at snail pace, we are told that the top 3 acts selected by the Nationwide votes are: Piyush and the Fine tuners ; Lokmanya Tilak Sanskritik Nyas, Ujjain ; and Prince Dance Group from Orissa. Quite obviously, there were no surprises as to who were declared the winners – Prince Dance Group. But I am a bit disappointed at the choices that India made as the runners up. Aslam Khan and Group, Rohan Dance Group and M-Sonic deserved that space in the runners up than any of the other acts. But then, India ne meri kab suni hai? And btw! Could Rani Mukherjee be any less interested in the results? She and Shahid just went on chatting as Nikhil announced the results. Whateva!

So there you go.

The first winner of India’s Got Talent – Prince Dance Group from Orissa.

What a season it has been! Very colourful! But before I go, you might have noticed, that I have kinda unknowingly kept away from mentioning Shekhar Kapoor throughout the post. That’s because he showed quite a few lukewarm responses which were not at all screencaping-worthy. You know who wins that game – Kirron Kher. Yes, Sonali is indeed very photogenic and pretty, but Kirron jee gives the best reactions. We wrap up with a montage of the judges reaction through this season.

Kirron Kher

Shekhar Kapoor

and finally, Sonali!!!

The Good, The Bad, And the mediocre!

I’d rather let the pictures do the talking in this post. And yes, there are many. The five semi-finals of India’s Got Talent were held from 26th of July to the 9th of August. Each Semi-final episode selected two out of ten acts, hence sending ten acts to the Grand Finale. What was not expected, was that there will be a WildCard entry round which will be a battle between a few acts which the judges thought were deserving to be in the Finals. No idea which acts will those ones be, but am rooting for Aslam Khan and Group, from Rajasthan. I just love Qawwali, Sufi and Rajasthani Folk music. But for now, let’s see who made it to the top 10, and who did not quite make it.

Semi-Final 1:

Winners: Lokmanya Tilak Sanskritik Nyas, Ujjain

I believe this is the best that could and would happen to the group. They are in the finals, and it is not any small feat. But, frankly speaking, this is not a act to beat.

Sneha and Richard

For the Salsa duo, jazzing and burning the dance floor with their svelte moves and ravishing chemistry, this is just the beginning. They might not win this competition, but there are bigger worlds to conquer.

Disappointment 1: Viren from Ranchi, aka MJ Jr.

I really thought that he would at least make it to the finals.

Disappointment 2: Aslam Khan and Group

It was a WTF moment for me when Aslam Khan and Group were not in the Top 3 of Audience voted Semi Finalists. It is exactly what I had feared. This act is an act to beat, a world-class act which defines India’s beauty and richness. And if we, ourselves, the people of India do not appreciate it, who else will?

Semi Final 2:

Winners: Rajesh Amrale

Again a surprise winning act. Of course it is Malkhamb, but there was a similar act which won in the previous episode. Nothing against it, but hard to believe that this act will win it.

Satyajit Padhye

He is a genius ventriloquist, truly. His act was crisp and humorous and in every way entertaining. His charm comes across easily with his script, his puppet- Chhotu Singh and it was an absolute delightful watch.

Semi Final 3:

Winners: Mandeep Singh Dance Group

Its Bhangra. Period! Can anything go wrong? The vigour, the explosion of happiness and extreme colours come alive with this act, and its a joy to watch. Is it an act which can be considered as a contender? That remains to be seen.

M-Sonic from Guwahati

One of my favorites to win. They are pretty much the underdogs of this competition. The entire competition is overshadowed by glitzy performers and performances, from dancers to acrobats. M-Sonic is a plain-jane Rock Band, with vocalist Mainak Nandy’s flawless renditions of Teri Deewani and the Semi-Final winning performance of A.R.Rahman’s -Maa Tujhe Salaam. They surely have places to go, and winning this competition would probably be the beginning of their journey to success.

Semi Final 4:

Winners: Piyush and the Finetuners

This was a surprise as well. My problem is that their sound is a bit messy, and it is a bit all over the place. Maybe they do sound much better in the studio. But, another problem is that, I really do not appreciate much of the utensils-turned-into-instruments-kinda-fusion. I’d rather enjoy listening to Sivamani play the “Beat of Passion” in Taal, rather than see him perform it. But then, that’s me. India thought otherwise, and they are in the Finals.

Rohan Dance Group

As Shekhar Kapoor sez: From New York to Nala Supara. Rohan Dance Group’s Hip Hop is simply put- Brilliant. The perfect pauses, flips, b-boying are mindblowing and precise. The choreography is top notch and reminds me of Step Up 2, Jabberwocky, Kaba Modern and yeah of course, this years ABDC winners – Quest Crew. But these guys chose a very interesting mix of Madcon -Beggin [ one of my fav Hip Hop tracks ] and Dhan Te Nan from the Kaminey Soundtrack. It was just awefhum to see them win this round of Semi-Finals, and I can’t wait to see them in the Finale.

Semi-Final 5: The winners have not been announced yet. But I know for sure, who’s gonna get through to the finals from this Semi Final round.

1: Sadhya Dance Academy

Patriotism works. So does, fusion with acrobatics,and spandex and Kalaripayattu. Sonali vouched for them. And I trust her..blindly.

2: Prince Dance Group from Orissa.

I’d rather keep my mouth shut. And just let the images below do the talking.

They came, we saw, and they conquered our hearts with their audition performance.

As Ayushman correctly said, “Apne Viraat Roop se unhone humara Dil Jeet Liya”

And then in the Semi-Finals, they did this.

Need I say more, who’s gonna win those 50 lakh Rs! The studio audience cried out loud “Vande Mataram”, and the judges were overwhelmed by the enormity of this performance..yet again. We have the winner.

But yes, we do have the Wild Card entry round, in which some semi-finalists will battle it out to get a second chance to enter the finals of India’s Got Talent. I wish the following are included in that round.

Meher’s Belly Dancing; K Suresh’s Spine Chilling stunts, and Priya Raina‘s very delightful mimcry.

The little Vaishnavi Patil perfected emotional atyachar with the carbon copy portrayal of “Bhul Bhulaiya” – Monjulikaa; and she has the smile of a 1000 volts. Yes, I measured that with a Voltmeter.

Ameek Singh Raina from Jammu. He’s a kid with a great voice. Yeah, that’s the only reason why I’m vouching for him.

Amar Jyoti School from Delhi aka the act which made Shekhar Kapoor break into tears on National TV. The Semi Final round performance was very emotional, and actually quite beautiful. Not to forget the ever-giggling little angel.

Jasleen Royal. I know, I can hear a lot of WTFs. But remember, she was in the top3 voted by the audience. She’s weird. She’s weird.[ Not a typo, I said that twice] And I think India kinda diggs that weird chick appearance.

On a serious note, I can only see Aslam Khan and Group to be true competition to “Prince Dance Group”. I just want them in the finals…very badly. They SHOULD be in the finals. Are you listening Mr.Sidhharth Basu; I don’t care if you rig the competition or do anything. Just get them in the finals by hook or by crook.

But well,not to forget my favorites :

M-Sonic from Assam:

Rohan Dance Group from Mumbai

and Prince Dance Group from Orissa:

The only celeb guest judges, this season so far, have been Shruti Hassan and Imraan Khan, who were on the mission to promote their box-office loser Luck.

And finally, let’s not forget the real celebs on the show.

A) The ever smiling- Kirron Kher

B) The Emossanal Man- Shekhar Kapoor

C) And finally, the ravishing as ever, Sonali Bendre.

We’ll be back with the final winners post. Shout out loud in the comments. Cheers.

P.S. Special Thanks to Darshit (@dunkdaft) for his tweet tutorial on Arcsoft Photostudio. And sorry, I have not hyperlinked any of the videos of the performances; just search for them on YouTube or Dailymotion. If you can’t find them, tweet me @SujoySingha.

Ye Dil Maange Aur…

Bahut Khoobsoorat Hai Hindustan…Aapka Fann, Aapki Aawaz…Aapki Sangeet…Aapka Nritya…Kitni Ameer Hai..

I love India’s Got Talent. I love India’s Got Talent [IGT] for showcasing the various talent acts from my motherland, India. And the world is watching. The stage has been set, and it is not only for the Indian viewers to watch. The format of ‘Got Talent’ has always been followed by online viewers, all across the length and breadth of the globe, and hence the expectations from the judges of the show to showcase only the best of the best of India’s talent is very justified. How can we be left behind when names like Susan Boyle and Paul Potts are becoming online favorites. The first online success from the India’s Got Talent show is the Illuminati group from Mumbai who performed an onstage depiction of the classic Nintendo Game – Super Mario – consisting every detail – from the Mushrooms, to Mari and Luigi fighting with lasers and the Princess Castle.[ They got mentions in Game Fanboy blogs like Boing Boing, Kotaku and Nintendo WiiBlog]. The bad thing is, that this act did not make it to the 40 semi-finalists.

This raises another question. Unlike the US, UK or Australia, India has a lot of inherent folk acts which has ‘INDIA’ written in Capital Letters. These acts showcase India of the villages – the Krishna Act from Orissa , or Aslam Khan’s Rajasthani folk song group, or the Malkhamb acts. It won’t be surprising if the Incredible India campaign from the Tourism of India department chooses these acts to promote Indian tourism. On the other end of the spectrum, we have acts showcasing the modern India, the hip hop dancers from Nala Supara Mumbai, to acts like the Nintendo – Super Mario, and even rock bands. Also, in a country where the TV Channels are already pouring Talent shows which are choosing the Best Dancers, Best Singers and Best Dance groups, do we think TALENT is limited to only these. Are we prepared as a nation to crown, for example, the Krishna act, as the winner of Season 1 of IGT ?

One major concern is the way this show has acts which are performed by a group of not so fortunate [ in other words, handicapped -physically or mentally] people. Although, it is a big boost or encouragement for them, but again, if these acts were to make it to the top 40, will they able to handle the pressure of live Television, big stage and audience votes? Will they be able to handle rejection in front of the camera? And also, please stop playing ‘Ye Haunsla’ in the background every time we see a group of handicapped people.

IGT has Bhangra, Laavni, Manipuri, Kathak and Hip Hop on the same stage with Carnatic music on Saxophones, or Indian classical music fused with Rock or Electronica, or even Punjapi Rap – doesn’t it undermine the superiority of our folk culture, classical music and dances by putting them on a single stage, and then, getting them voted off, to prove that the nation prefers Hip Hop over a Laavni performance. Although, I am elated with the shows concept of travelling across the length and breadth of the country to showcase talent from even remote areas of the country, and put them on a platform for the world to see, it still makes me feel sad when an act like the Raavana Act gets eliminated [ even when he was so crap].
Don’t get me wrong. I digg Hip Hop, and do try to ‘drop it like its hot’ sometimes.[ My fav dance groups have been Kaba Modern and Jabawokeez] But c’mon. Reality shows like Boogie Woogie, Sa re Ga Ma, or dance Indian Dance also feature awesome dancers, or singers don’t they? My argument put in simple words is this: Hip Hop, no matter how awesome it is, should not win this show – because Hip Hop in itself doesn’t represent INDIA. IGT is not just a show; it is also a global statement. So, my appeal for the audience is: Please select a winner for the show, who represents INDIA in the truest form. These dancers and musicians can get other reality shows to appear again and show their moves or musical skills. But IGT is the only stage where the variety artists get to show their talent. Anyway, I leave you with some more screenshots of some awesome and some not-so- awesome acts on IGT.

The Dancers:

As Kirron Kher says, “Humka Lagat Hai Ki Michael Jackson Raanchi Mein Hi Paida Hua Hai”.

Parvez Dance Group from Mumbai.

Rohan Dance Group from Mumbai

Sneha and Richard set the stage on fire with their Salsa performance.

Locking and Popping on Daft Punk’s Technologic – Vishnu on IGT

And then…the not so quite efficient mimic of Mithunda meets Mr.Bachhan’s Yarana avatar.

Even his bulbs got fused  out of shame.

The Incredible India Variety Acts:

Naman International Theatre Group portraying Surya, the Sun God.

Little Vaishali Patil dancing to Shankar’s Breathless left the audience breathless. And have a look at the evolutionary reaction of judge, Shekhar Kapoor.

Reaction 1:

Reaction 2:

The Ladies performed Vande Mataram on the Saxophone. Spellbound.

Ventriloquist Satyajit Padhye on IGT.

Biggest name in the contest – Lokmanya Tilak Sanskritik Nyas Ujjain

Brass Band – Shaadi Wala Band – no Emossanal Atyachar, only Celebration!!! Have a look at Kirron Jee’s reaction.

Reaction 1:

Kirron Kher getting emossanal..ahem emotional.

Reaction 2:

Kirron Kher gets emotional and Dances…overwhelming emotions.

Two more acts are on this category, which are my Favorites to win this season.

Numbah 1: The Krishna Act from Orissa.

Is that a painting? Is that a movie? Is that a dance? Its all of it. Its an experience

Numbah 2: Aslam Khan and Group

Padhaaro Nee, Mhaare Dess…Bow to thee…we are belittled by your Beauty..by your Talent!!

The REST OF IT:

The following acts do not fit into the above two categories. And so, here we go.

IGT Fusion Group Blendz creating music.

Two words..Chal Jhooti

Frankly, she looks quite stoned, her hair is all over her face, her voice is not quite awesome, and well ..that’s it. But she got selected for the semis. Don’t you think she is a bit spaced out?

Moushumi Di on IGT reminds me of Runa Laila. Seriously. I feel like she’d start singing ” Shaader Laau” any moment. And she should. That”’ certainly get her more votes.

Priya Raina from Jammu on IGT mimics Sridevi, Juhi Chawla, Karisma Kapoor, Kajol, Priyanka Chopra. She’s brilliant.

Super Mario stage representation by Illuminati. Even though they were not selected for the Top 40, they get my vote

And well, how can we wind up without mentioning Sonali’s beautiful closeup shots. So here we go.

Shot 1:

Aila!!

Shot 2:

Very long post it was!!! Phew! Go on, shout out loud in the comments. The next post on IGT will have a review of the entire show as a whole, and will be posted only after the semi-finals. C ya !

It was high time we saw this show get the green signal. Although there are big challenges to be overcome to put up this format on Indian Television, the outcome is just way too tempting – for both the channel broadcasting it, and we, the audience. And India’s Got Talent [aka IGT] saw the light of the day on Colors with the first episode airing on 27th June 2009. And the tagline goes – Hunar Hi Winner Hai [ Talent is only the winner ]. Now that I have seen the first three episodes, here are my initial thoughts.

India’s Ant & Dec – Ayushman and Nikhil:

Both have had experience in hosting TV Shows on MTV India, so this should be a cakewalk for them. Both Ayushman and Nikhil are quite a delight to watch as the hosts. Although this show is indeed about the Talent showcase, the hosts do need to pull some strings to make their presence felt. May be it will be more visible during the Live Semi-Finals [ if there is any]. But other than that, no complaints really. Who else could have done this job? Actually bringing in Aditya Narayan’s extra-Hindi-encyclopedia would have ruined the show, and bringing Cyrus Broacha would have made the show utterly confusing. So, I guess its a good choice of casting the current hosts.

The Judges:
Shekhar Kapoor:

The only male in the trio. Who does not know him? Director of memorable films like Masoom, Mr.India, Bandit Queen, Elizabeth etc., Mr.Kapoor seems to be the most apt choice as he has been exposed to the art scene in India and abroad. Although I do doubt if a man of his caliber should be made to sit on that chair, rather than involved in a movie production [Paani, we are anxiously waiting for that]. But nevertheless, if there is anyone who deserves to be in the chair, it is him. Hail Mogambo!

Kirron Kher:

Kirron with an extra R. Actress par-excellence. We have only seen her as a guest-judge in some of the reality TV shows, but this is her first full-time judging job. I have been a big fan of her work – be it in art-house cinema viz. Bariwali, Darmiyan or Sardari Begam, or even her recent commercial portrayals in Rang De Basanti, Hum Tum, Om Shanti Om and Dostana. As a veteran actress, she definitely has the eye for talent and she belongs to the judge’s chair.

Sonali Bendre:

Our very own Amanda Holden. Although, Sonali’s claim to fame is not strictly confined to Reality TV, she has definitely got a career resurrection of sorts due to this medium. Honestly, she never did have an explosive film career. Her only noted role was in Sarfarosh [ as the naughty Seema , remember-Ajee, don't mind!]. Well you can include films like Zakhm to the list as well. But other than that, in most of her movies, she has been an eye-candy [ and I confess, that we all loved her in that avatar]. And she is playing the same role here as well. She is the eye-candy of the show and thanks to the extreme close-ups like the one below.Sonali has been on Indian Idol last season, and hence, she does try to impress us with her knowledge of judging Musical Talent. You go girl! Gather all the TRPs if you can. Chham Chham karta Hai Ye Nashila Badan [ Attempt at Translation: My intoxicated body makes the sound-Chham Chham ].

The cities:

The lineup so far [ till Episode 3] has been quite impressive – Delhi, Kolkata, Ahmedabad, Mumbai, Chennai, Lucknow. And the pool of talent that has been exhibited so far just left me spellbound. Some of my favourite acts are discussed below.

M-Sonic from Guwahati: Woo-Hoo!!

Ahomor Band maanuh aahise!!!
M-Sonic sang Kailash Kher’s ‘Teri Deewani’. The vocalist has it. Very good performance indeed. The only challenge is that whether they can keep the game going. What would be next from their bag?

Bappa Excel Group from Ghatkopar-Mumbai:

Genuinely entertaining and a great piss-take of Yenna Rascala dance-form. Hilarious!

Chhao Nritya from Vardhaman, West Bengal:

I am quite religious when it comes to Durga Pujo. And this act had me bow down to the TV screen. India is a religious nation, and this act certainly belongs to this big stage for its variety, colours, dedication and devotion.

Malkhamb guy from Mumbai:

What can I say? The ultimate test of Balance and control. Else, you got to have the iron balls. This act is just jawdropping for people not familiar to Malkhamb. For us, who have seen it before, we want more!!

Robo Ganesh from Chennai:

This Anna from Chennai does not understand Hindi, but surely can do the Robot. He mimed Jim Carrey’s mask in his entry, did a knee-puppet act. And concluded with his Robot lock-pop. He surely is talented, and reminded me instantly of Prabhu Deva. Don’t you agree?

And finally, the biggest , best-est act that I have seen so far, and already a big favourite to win this season.
Krishna act from Orissa:

And because I am not still satisfied with the above screenshot, here is another one for your viewing pleasure.

Hit this link to view the performance video.

And finally to wrap it up: Brain-torturing Emotional drama, aka Emossanal Atyachar.

Indian Reality TV is replete with examples of over-the-top emotional outpouring. Be it the Himmess-Ashaji on-camera debate, or Hema-Malini walking out of some TV Show because she felt insulted by a comic sketch of Sholay. There are numerous examples which we cannot forget, and even if we tried hard enough, we won’t be able to. Being a format which has worked worldwide majorly due to its heartfelt emotional quotient [ Majority of the contestants across the world have a sad story to tell, and bank on a underdog or a loser-so-far and striving to win story]. The Indian audience being an extremely emotional junta, we demand such shows to have this aspect displayed in full colour, especially when we have got this being dealt in other Reality shows already. But the thing is, how much is too much?

Is it the cynical side of me that says okay, enough!!! Stop crying now. But then, the most genuine act with a genuine story does strike a chord, no matter how much you try to be cynical. I think that is why our judges showed the following reactions.

Shekhar Kapoor Sob! Sob!

Kirron Kher sob sob!!

But why haven’t we seen Sonali break down to tears. She is too concerned about her make-up. C’mon!!! Amanda is known for her tears. Show us some Aansoo!! Till then, we have to just keep staring at her close-ups!!

One last thing: Sidhharth Basu’s Synergy Communications

Has Sidhharth Basu, the Quizmaster Mr.Basu’s company – Synergy Communications been acquired by the Anil Ambani BIG brand? Synergy Communications has been the company behind the Indian gameshows -Kaun Banega Crorepati amongst others. But has Mr.Ambani’s ever-expanding empire taken this as well under its control. Need proof? Have a look!