Voldemort vs. Orochimaru: CompareTheDarklords.com

Watching The Half Blood Prince made me realise a lot of things. One of them was that how an almost 3 hour movie with wizardry, dark-lords, death, and zombies could be turned into a 2.5 hours soap-opera. I mean, give me a break from the Love potioned Ron Weasley, or the Harry-Hermione emotional atyachar! I paid friggin 11 quid for this seat. Now just blast my eyes with some fireworks already! And yes, when you choose certain scenes for 3D over others, please try and select the ones which could be termed ‘sexy’ rather than plain-ol conversations in the hallway, or a lounge chair morphing into Mr.Jim Broadbent. #fail #fail #fail.

But yes, one of the other things which has emerged from the many discussions I have been having with my friends [especially that David bloke], is that how similar Voldemort – the ultimate dark lord, and the ultimate dark-Ninja we know of – Orochimaru are. So here I am, doing my analysis of their similarities and the differences as well. Whether, Harry Potter inspired Naruto [as in JK Rowling inspired Kishimoto] is a very sensitive debate which is out of the scope of this argument. We will be restricting our analysis to whether Voldemort and Orochimaru are indeed similar or not. Part 2 of the Analysis will be trying to answer a Kick-Ass question, literally – In a duel, who will kick who’s butt [and who will eat the dust] -Voldemort or Orochimaru. Pick your side!

First things first. The analysis chart with the Comparison Parameters. Here it is – the Curious Case of Voldemort vs. Orochimaru.

Separated at Birth again? Or the same man?

Separated at Birth? Or the same man?

Now for the big battle between the two. WHO WILL KICK WHO’s ARSE?

a) Why will Voldemort Pwn Orochimaru?

~ He’s got Avada Kedavra – the Death Spell.

~ He can kinda dodge Orochimaru’s attacks with his teleportation wizardry.

~ His soul is split into 7 horcruxes. So he can’t die until those are destroyed, one of which is *ahem* [ deleted to avoid spoilers ]. So to kill Voldemort, you have to destroy that too. Too much to ask for.

~ Orochimaru’s snakes can be controlled by Voldemort as he knows how to speak to them in Parseltongue.

~ Can Orochimaru withstand any Wizardry spell, even a basic one like – Petrificus Totalus

~ If Sasuke can pwn Orochimaru, Voldemort can surely do it too….. or can he?

b) Why will Orochimaru totally pwn Voldemort?

~ The ridiculously huge snake Manda can totally consume everything that Voldemort has – him, his Death Eaters and everything.

~ Sasuke did not defeat him. He was just a bit sick when Sasuke got the better of him. But Orochimaru cannot die. So Avada Kedavra might not be relevant in this battle.

~ Any other spell of Voldemort can be easily dodged by a Ninja of the level of Orochimaru.

~ Manda cannot understand Voldemort speaking to it in Parseltongue, coz it speaks only Japanese.

~ Orochimaru can disarm Voldemort but not the other way around! Huaaahahahaha.

~ Someone mentioned – Oro could kill Voldemort with a Kunai or a neck-bite, and then making him his new vessel. How evil will that be!!

~ Ninja Powers rock. There are way too many jutsus that Orochimaru knows, and most of them are the dark ones. And he has experimented them on himself, and his army of followers – not just a bunch of losers known as the Death Eaters.

So…you guys decide who wins the Battle of the Darklords. Me deciding Orochimaru would be unfair as I am a Naruto Devotee more than a Harry Potter fan. And then, both of them belong to different universes – one from the world of wizardry and the other from Ninjas. Wizard Spell vs. Ninja Jutsus is quite an unpredictable situation and could swing in any direction. Because Magic is Magic, and Jutsus are well…Jutsus. What you say? Shout out loud in the comments section :)

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17 thoughts on “Voldemort vs. Orochimaru: CompareTheDarklords.com

  1. Quite interesting. I dont follow Naruto, but just am familiar with the names. Comparison parameters are xcellent.

    Though I liked your tweets abt soap opera. I actually loved those portions. Emma looked mmmm…lovely.

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  2. Ninja Power rocks and Orochimaru is totally gonna pwn Voldemort. Very true that Orochimaru can get Voldemort and all his horcuxes with just a kunai…suck that wizards

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  3. I vote for Orochimaru!
    this is why…
    Sasuke defeated Orochimaru and Harry defeated Voldemort…
    Sasuke is WAY stronger than Harry…
    there for Orochimaru is WAY stronger than Voldemort!
    plus magic, when you think about is, is kinda like genjutsu and Orochimaru can fight using genjutsu (granted he isn’t that good at it – just look what happened between him and Itachi)
    and as for horcruxes – Orochimaru can always get a new vessel
    as for talking to snakes – well they both can so that pretty much is even… what else is there??? ohhhh the death eaters – well Orochimaru has a lot of people working for him and he also has Kabuto (the number one most dedicated ninja) – so he wins with amount of followers… what about the fact that EVERYONE is scare of Voldemort (too scared to even say his name)??? well, the fear is fading (more and more people are calling him by his name). And in terms of looks: Voldemort with the slit nose or Orochimaru, who looks scarier? – i’d have to say Orochimaru coz he ALWAYS looked like that even when he was a kid… where as Voldemort, or Tom as he was known then, looked normal.
    So for the final statement…
    In a fight between Voldemort and Orochimaru, Orochimaru would definately win ’cause 1. he’s WAY stronger, 2. he can get a new vessel 3. he’s got Kabuto, 4. he’s frickin scary 5. he was taught by the Third Hokage

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  4. As Voldemort can't die thanks to the Horcruxes,and he is the second best wizard in the magical community ever,I think voldemort will cut Orochimaru into pieces.He would use a simple Petrificus Totalus on his giant snake or talk to him and then kill Orochimaru with Avada Kedavra or torture him to death with Crucio…so I think Voldemort.

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    OrochimaruPWNS Reply:

    but Manda wouldn’t understand Voldermort. so Oro winssss!!!!!! PWN!! All you Harry Potter Nerds!!!! MUHAHAHAHHAHAH!!!

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  5. hehe.. fair enough analogy.. but again… ninja powers and magic in wizardry and dark arts are two different universes… there r enough supporting evidences on either sides :)

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  6. Of course Orochimaru will win. A simple kage bunshin no jutsu, and one final death blow from each clone, Voldy can kiss his ass goodbye. He even don’t have to use his real body to do the dirty job. I mean, c’mon, even that ridiculously strong baldie can’t spell more than one avada kedavra at a time. And I don’t think protego can defend it’s user from chakra-base attack. As for destroying horcrux, well, I believe Manda’s poison can do as much as Basilisk’s

    And, FYI, even ungraduated academy ninja can use henge no jutsu to mimic other people, animal, or any other creature (well, Rock Lee is the exception here) while a lot of graduated wizard find it’s difficult to make a polijus (which can only usefull in mimicing human) . So, it’ll be easy for Orochimaru to infiltrate Voldemort’s HQ with any camouflage he want, and kill Voldy at the moment he’s distracted most.

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  7. Manda can understand Parseltongue. It is the language of the snakes. I don’t believe for one minute that Manda wouldn’t know how to communicate with other snakes. There is also no “English Parseltongue” or “Japanese Parseltongue”. There is just Parseltongue, plain and simple.

    That said, I believe the powers in the world of Naruto are much more ridiculously high and unbelievable than Harry Potter’s. The level that the Naruto characters fight on is higher overall than the level the wizards do. I’ve been a fan of Naruto’s in the past (although I haven’t read the last few chapters; I’ve been slacking), but at the moment I’m more of a Harry Potter fan.

    In a fight, I’d say Orochimaru would clusterfuck Voldemort or win in some equally ridiculous way. The ninja fights in the manga are full of “oh surprise you didn’t actually get me” and “my chakra’s low, so I’ve got an even stronger move than the last one – and now I’ve got an even stronger one!”, which Voldemort couldn’t keep up with, as he prefers things to be a lot simpler when it comes to dueling, not to mention the opponents he’s fought in the past haven’t exactly been on his level. He wouldn’t be able to kill Voldemort, thanks to Volde’s horcruxes. Of course, if Voldemort was able to research and prepare for his fight with Orochimaru, my conclusion might be a different story.

    Overall, I think Voldemort makes a much better villain and a much worthier Dark Lord. He’s smarter, for one, and he’s made Wizarding World history for pushing the bounds of the Dark Arts further than any wizard before him.

    At ImNoGeek: Perhaps, but how would Orochimaru know about Voldemort’s horcruxes in the first place? It’s not like Dumbledore and Harry would be willing to tell another shady, snake-like man about them. :/ Not even Voldemort’s most trusted Death Eaters know. (And he won’t be able to find out from a certain R.A.B.; he’s dead.) So, really, Voldemort would be able to survive no matter what Orochimaru did.

    (And, personally, I thought HBP was awesome, but that’s another conversation entirely.)

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    Casey Reply:

    @Daemyn,
    “Perhaps, but how would Orochimaru know about Voldemort’s horcruxes in the first place?”
    Knowing shit like that is kind of EXACTLY what ninjas do. In the Naruto universe, knowledge is power. Knowledge, preparation, thinking 10 moves ahead in real-time, considering every possible outcome before-during-and after a fight. Thats the general credo for the whole series. And to top it off, Orochimaru was one of THE major badass’s in all categories. Major intelligence networks, secrecy, all that evil ninja goodness.

    “He’s smarter, for one”
    Thats debatable. Both villains are impossibly intelligent hyper-genius’s. My opinion is Orochimaru is smarter, because the shear amount of knowledge people are capable of retaining in the Naruto verse is bordering on nonsensical. Naruto being one of the biggest brains in said universe, puts him ahead in my books.

    And about the “controlling snakes” thing that was mentioned earlier; They both control snakes. One through communication (Voldemort), and the other through… Badassery? Dominance? Various chakra-related goodies? Who knows. From what Ive seen, they arent even real snakes, more like extensions of his own body/chakra/jutsu-madness. Saying Volde could control his snakes by talking to them is like saying you could convince a a muggers arm to stop beating on you by talking at it. On top of which, being able to talk to Mandra is no guarantee he’ll do what you want. He’d be more likely to eat Voldemort than help him just because he could pass for a snake while sleeping in tall grass.

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  8. You all forget one thing. The ninjas in Naruto move wayyyyy faster than in Harry Potter. Orochimaru just makes a clone of himself and makes voldemort think he killed it. Then he goes behind voldemort and kicks his ass. If voldemort retaliates and shoots things out of his wand… Orochimaru can just dodge it with his ridiculously fast ninja skills.

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  9. That’s a tough one. I think that if either on won, it would be by a hair. The only thing is that Orochimaru can’t block Avada Kedavra. So if Voldemort uses that, Orochimaru’s basically screwed, unless he knew about the effects beforehand and used substitution or something. An you forgot that Orochimaru can summon the dead!

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